One of the hardest things, as a parent, is when your child is sick. On our way up north, Mackenzie ended up throwing up on the way and spiking a fever the whole first night. As promised, I never left her side. I held back her hair when she got sick, I put a cold compress on her head to cool her down, and I held her close without a single fear of getting what she had. She woke up the next morning with the fever gone and feeling much better. You could tell she appreciated me fulfilling the promise to stay with her. After all, that is what moms do (well, most do anyway).
Then Delaney got sick. Her poor mouth filled up with sores and she screamed in pain. She wouldn’t sleep, wouldn’t eat and cried non stop. When I swooped in to play “Mommy Hero” once again, she simply screamed, “Daddy! I want Daddy!”
Okay, so I get it. She is at the age when she is fickle…going between the two of us. I am happy she loves her daddy and wants him to comfort her (while I sleep). However, there is that sinking, helpless feeling when your baby doesn’t want you. I cannot wipe the tears or kiss her head or hold her while she drifts into much-needed sleep. Nope, I get to force down the yucky medicine and make her irate. I make her lay down to sleep, much to her dismay. But, when she screams for someone to hold her close, I am not the one.
Now, you may say that there is a bright side…sleep and time to get things done. I know Todd looks at me like, “Can’t you do some of this?” When I try, the screams and swats begin (oh, the swatting!). I look at Todd and shrug, and he is doing all the soothing. While I know he loves that Laney worships him right now, I know he really wants a break. He looks to me like I am doing nothing while she cries (well, okay…maybe I am blogging while he is on duty right now, but she DOESN’T want me!). I would happily change spots with him right now, if Laney would let me.
I know in the morning, she will feel better. I know that she will continue to whine to get Dad to do whatever she wants (she has mastered this) until he catches on that she is much better. However, until then, I feel left out. I know when I am sick, I really want my Mom, so I expect my kids to want the same.
I guess this will not be the last time my girls go to their Dad instead of me for something. But, I can’t help but feel a little bummed that I am not who she wants. The bright side? At least my girls have two parents who love them and can go to either of us. I have a partner in this, and I know my time will come.
